A potential change

So, I'm just going to put this out there...  It's all I can think about this morning.  We haven't spread the news, because it isn't even "news" yet...  

But typing something as a story sometimes helps me to "process" through it, so here goes...  

Jeff came across an ad for a teaching job, at Calvin College, in his hometown of Grand Rapids MI.  It seems like it would be a perfect fit for what he's been wanting to do for almost 30 years.

The deadline was almost past when he found the job description, but they allowed a little extra time and encouraged him to apply.

There are so many "if"s.  IF this, and IF that, but the one sure thing is that, IF this job has his name on it, the income would be significantly less than his salary is now.  

So, looking at online real estate listings.  A farm would most likely be out of the question.  And even if we could afford a little bit of land, packing up all of what we have here would be very unlikely.

Last night, I lay awake in bed, thinking about the rabbits.  I've been considering selling them and not raising American Chinchilla rabbits anymore.  And last night at 4 in the morning it was clear as...um....day, "sell the rabbits"  

So this morning I contacted my friend Vikki who is thrilled to be getting the buck (male) that I was going to send her way in the spring, plus a nice doe that I was going to keep for our own breeding program.  I contacted the customer who has been waiting all year, through our losses of so many rabbit kits which should have been healthy.  I let her know that when she comes this month for one from the youngest litter, and a nice doe that I've saved for her since the summer litters, she can buy others if she is still interested.  When she chooses (if she chooses any), the ones that are left will be offered to the other customer who also waited patiently until the fall litters were old enough for him.  He wanted a few more adults, if I ever decided to sell...

In pig news, I knew a few months ago that I needed to move/sell a few more pigs.  The adult boar is being replaced with the two younger ones that I bought this year.  My sow Cameo has an almost identical pedigree to Big Bea, and since I'm keeping Bea, and keeping one of Cameo's daughters, Cameo was for sale.  One of Bea's daughters was still here but shaping up to be a nice breeding quality gilt.

Someone from Indiana was looking for a boar, jumped at the chance to buy Cameo, and is also buying Bea's daughter (the one we nicknamed "Sassy" because of her habit of letting herself out of the hog pen and trotting everywhere around the barnyard and barn.)

Cameo's litter of 7 starts leaving next week, when they are 9 weeks old.  

The butcher pigs that we raised for a year have been gone for a few months now.  And the lambs which were raised to sell have long since been and gone and are in the customers' freezers.

Bessie is for sale, along with her calf, but her age will stop most people from thinking twice.  A friend will take the calf and raise him on pasture in the spring/summer.  Bessie may go along for a few months, but probably will be gone from here before Carrie's wedding in July...

It feels like things are winding down, and we don't even have an answer to the job/move yet.  

Monday is the phone interview.  When that goes well, there will be an in-person interview for Jeff in February at Calvin...

I find myself looking at the remaining pigs, at the pregnant sheep and goats, at the breeding trios of ducks/geese/turkeys, and at the feeder pigs that we're raising for other people.  Everything could be wrapped up quite nicely by the middle of summer 2017 if it had to be.   

But!!!  I am not giving myself permission to cry about the thought process just yet.  

(This set of breeding quality pigs could go to this customer...  This trio of sheep could be sold with their lambs in the spring...  These fainting goats could be a nice starter flock for someone else....  This customer wanted more geese and ducks if I ever wanted to sell my breeding adults...)  It's all just a lot of "if's" so far, right?

Hauilng water this morning, I let myself think for just one second that it would be really nice not to trudge over frozen mud with hot water for the next three months, as (IF!) the animals slowly left this little farm.  

And the reality is....  I'm giving in too soon, since we don't even know what will happen yet.  But with a big unknown looming over me until at least Monday, and possibly longer, my brain is trying to grasp onto something, rather than just "maintaining", until I know for sure.

So maybe it's time for a new adventure, but a big part of me wants to really hang on tight to THIS particular adventure, the one that would keep us here with 16 degree weather, sandhill cranes flying high above and chortling, prairie wind whipping fiercely around the corner of the barn.  

It is in God's hands....but there sure is a lump in my throat and an ache in my chest as I think about it.  

Maybe it's OK to cry just a little at the thought of possibly leaving this little farm venture, and then...well, looks like it's just about time to haul more water to the pigs and goats and rabbits.  

  

 

Laura